Published by Aurum Press, 2011.

Dr Seuss wrote this simple rhyming picture book, which was first published in 1957, to make learning to read more fun. The story is told by an unnamed boy, who with his sister Sally is bored at home on a rainy day while their mother is out. Then a tall, cartoon cat enters the house and causes chaos, much to the distress of the pet fish. He lets out two creatures from a crate, who make even more mess. Luckily, he has a machine which cleans and tidies everything before the mother gets home.

I don’t think the movie adaptation is totally devoid of merit. Dakota Fanning is believable and charming as Sally. The film does keep the concept of the story, has a vaguely 1950s style with pastel aesthetic, while the humour is a mixture of crude, anarchic and absurd. However the story has been warped so much that it’s weird but not in an enjoyable way. Why is there purple goo everywhere? Why are there some unpleasant adult jokes? Why is Paris Hilton posing in an underground club where everyone wears red and white striped hats? Why is the cat (Mike Myers) a cross between Krusty the Klown, the Cowardly Lion, the Genie, and Willy Wonka? Why does the cat pretend to be a British chef (using the word ‘bloody’ which apparently Americans think we say all the time) and cut the end off his tail? WHY is this film so horrible?

Some of the changes do make a little sense. For example, there is more at stake in having a tidy house, because the mother is going to have a party for her real estate colleagues that evening, and also the boy (who is named Conrad here) is under threat of military school if he doesn’t start behaving. The cat’s actions help get rid of the mother’s boyfriend (Alec Baldwin), a secret slob who is allergic to cat fur. Like some irresponsible and creepy Mary Poppins, the cat somehow manages to bring the family into harmony. Instead of leaving the kids home alone, we have a babysitter, the useless Mrs Kwan, who spends the whole time asleep and is even used as a raft; whether she’s narcoleptic, or if it’s some magic by the cat, is unclear. As well as the pet fish, there’s also a little dog with a silly hairstyle who when not escaping, is being stolen, or covered in purple goo, or put in a shampooing machine.

As the fish said, ‘Oh, I do not like it! Not one little bit!’

Image credit: Universal Pictures / DreamWorks Pictures – Internet Movie Database, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=81592607

The story is very, very slow-moving. There are many dreary paragraphs of the other men reciting what sound like essays on the prevailing intellectual opinions of the era, about politics, philosophy and especially women. These go on and on, which is perhaps the real horror of the book! On a serious note, I think the most tangible horror is the suffering caused by tuberculosis. I didn’t think the more supernatural horror element was particularly well done, but I did think it clever who the ‘we’, which the narrative voice sometimes slips into, turned out to be. Some of the writing expressions were very interesting and unusual, but old-fashioned at the same time, which gave the book the feel of a classic work. I didn’t enjoy the book much and was frustrated with it, but it was certainly different.

First published in Polish as Empuzjon, 2022. English translation by Antonia Lloyd-Jones published by Fitzcarraldo Editions, 2024.

I enjoyed the book as the style had a comfortable feel and was easy to read. We never get Elizabeth’s perspective, which is interesting as the author Maud Cairnes, as the introduction points out, was known as Lady Kathleen (she had a very long name) and had more in common with Elizabeth. I don’t think it would have been so amusing and she could have seemed snobbish when suddenly finding herself lowered in class. The book could have gone further and made Polly working class for a more extreme difference, but the story partially rests on their social circles beginning to overlap and the confusion this causes. Elizabeth’s smoking is mentioned quite often, as cigarettes were fashionable for upper-class women in the 1930s. Her friends suspect she is ill when she starts refusing her smokes, but actually she is inhabited by Polly, who doesn’t smoke. One interesting aspect which shows the class divide, is that whenever the two women have swapped, Polly (as Elizabeth) often ends up in bed attended by a doctor because everyone worries there’s something wrong with her nerves, while no such thing happens to Elizabeth (when she is Polly), probably because doctors were expensive and would only be called for physical illness. The two women never tell anyone else about their connection for fear of ending up in an asylum.

The book reminded me of another body-swap novel, The Victorian Chaise-Longue by Marghanita Laski, which was more of a horror story and dates from the 1950s.

Strange Journey was published in the British Library Women Writers series, 2022.

Thank you to the author and Zooloos Book Tours for the review copy. The book was published in 2025 by Rowan Prose.

In Solitaire, the protagonist is Tori (Victoria) Spring, older sister of Charlie from the later Heartstopper graphic novels. As the author explains in the material at the end of the book, she was inspired to go back to the story of Nick and Charlie. She later revisited Solitaire to make some edits for a new edition.

The novel is almost a stream of consciousness of what’s going on in Tori’s head, as she tries to navigate life. She’s drifting away from her friends, she can’t focus on anything, she worries about Charlie who has been treated for an eating disorder, she’s depressed. She can usually be found sprawled on her bed with a diet lemonade, updating her blog or half-watching a movie. The plot is about a series of escalating pranks on the school by someone called Solitaire, but this feels secondary to the development of Tori’s friendship, or possible romance, with Michael, an odd boy who skates. At times the novel is a frustrating read because it’s quite lengthy and rambling, without a sense of direction. There isn’t a clear sense of resolution. I was impressed by its realistic outlook, however. If I’d read this novel when I was the same age as Tori, I would relate to her a lot, except for when she claims to hate books! There are also a few mentions of Radiohead, which I think suggests that if you ‘get’ the music, it might be your type of read. There are other cultural references scattered throughout the book. Pride and Prejudice is a particular theme, as Tori has to study the book. The Catcher in the Rye is mentioned also – how could it be otherwise? – as the original story of an apathetic teen who thinks everything’s phony.

I think this is a very good debut, considering the author’s young age. Be warned that this novel becomes rather dark and is more suitable for the older YA reader.

First published in 2014.

I do have a favourite food, though. Chips! Hot or cold, fresh or old, crispy or soggy, plain or with sauce. The moment I spot someone eating chips, I’m there like a shot. I’ll grab those delicious, greasy fries, before anyone has time to react. If I’m feeling generous, I’ll share my loot with my friends. If not, I’ll fight them off. I won’t deliberately hurt anyone, but sometimes accidents happen. When I decide I want your food, you’d better let me grab it.

Today is brilliant. The hottest day of the year! I hang out at the busiest beach, where every person holds an ice cream in their hand. Dodging swipes and kicks, I weave through the crowd, stealing delicious cones. While children cry over their lost treats, I scream with laughter. When my belly is full of ice cream, I take a dip in the sea. It’s so refreshing. I’m waiting for the sun to start going down, when my favourite beachfront café gets busy.

They have an open side, with an awning over, so I can storm right in and help myself to chips. This one time, an entire family abandoned their meal when they saw me coming. I had a fantastic feast before the owner threw me out. This owner is my nemesis. Fortunately he’s always busy and by the time he spots my invasion, I’ve always eaten a fair amount.

I feel a little sleepy. I wander the back streets until I find somewhere secluded to have a nap. I settle down and slip into dreams of the sea, and clouds, and food. By the time I wake, it’s evening. I realise I slept for too long. I must get to the café, right now! With any luck, a lot of customers will be there, tucking into fish and chips. I rush to the café and without stopping to observe the diners, I barge straight in.

Bam! Crash! Stunned, I fall to the ground. My head throbs and I feel confused. I don’t know what happened. I can hear my mates laughing in the background. I’ll show them! I try and get into the café again and bump my head. That’s when I realise the café owner has put up glass. It’s not open to the air any more. I look through the glass and the owner is right there, smug and very clever. He must have been waiting for me. I suppose I should feel honoured he put in the glass specially for me. Right now I feel angry. I yell at him and thump the glass. My mouth waters as I see people stuffing their faces with fried food. The owner points at me and laughs.

I have the last laugh, though. I go around the back to where the bins are. The lids are unlocked, so I wrench them open and pull out the contents. I eat some discarded food, which tastes great even though it’s cold and half-chewed. Then I scatter the rubbish around and make a total mess.

Pleased with my handiwork, I wing it to the seafront, where I boast to some mates of what I’ve done. We have a good chuckle about it. Then I perch on a sign which says DO NOT FEED THE SEAGULLS. Someone gives me a piece of doughnut and photographs me eating it.

The life of a gull can be tough, but summer is super!

Highly recommended. I finished it in twenty-hour hours.

Published by Fig Tree (Penguin), 2026.

Some aspects of the book have not really aged well, but they do address the issues of racism and sexism in sport. The references to current footballers and pundits are rather out of date. Beckham himself, whose poster adorns the wall of Jes’ bedroom, retired from football in 2013. The book is not very detailed but I think it still has value today and anyone who enjoys the film would probably like the book too. There is quite a lot about women’s football in the media now, and I’ve seen books for children and young adults about it, but it wasn’t so common in 2002. The film paved the way; according to the internet, Chadha is planning a sequel for 2027, the 25th anniversary of the film.

Published by Hodder Headline, 2002.

There are a lot of details in the book that I either didn’t know, or maybe I found out from the fan sites and messageboards which abounded in the early 2000s and had forgotten. I felt that the inclusion of interview transcripts with the band and management were mostly not valuable, as if they were particularly interesting, they were quoted or paraphrased in the main text. I liked that there references to how Muse used the internet to promote their work and also that the author gives context of other bands from the time, as although the book wasn’t written that long ago, things move on quickly, so it’s a sort of time capsule. The last album mentioned is ‘The Resistance,’ which isn’t discussed as much as the previous albums. I appreciated the author’s honesty about his opinion of Muse; when he first met them for an interview, he thought they were very boring, which was a strange contrast to their music! But they were soon to prove him wrong, and he met the band many times.

This is a good read for any fan of Muse, whether you’re reading in the mornings or ‘Knights [of Cydonia]’, although the writing style might make you ‘Agitated’.

Published by Omnibus Press, 2014.