Dinner at a horrible fictional restaurant

Now open! A restaurant with a menu of dreadful meals from literature! Please be seated and make your choices:

Icons of fork, knife, spoon and a plate with open book.


Snozzcumbers (The BFG)

Soup with Extreme Amount of Pepper (Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland)

Dwarf Bread (Discworld)

Burnt Porridge (Jane Eyre)

Rocks (The NeverEnding Story)



Worms Spaghetti (The Twits)

Scrap Metal (The Iron Man)

Rotten Green Eggs (Fungus the Bogeyman)

Zakawheat Curry (from my story ‘Tasting Victory’ in After the Burning)

Live Flies and Spiders (Dracula)



Cockroach Clusters (Harry Potter)

Miss Havisham’s Wedding Cake (Great Expectations)

Fake Cheese which Breaks Your Teeth (Basil in Mexico)

Lumpy Custard with Skin (Adrian Mole: The Cappuccino Years)

Fruit made of Plaster (The Tale of Two Bad Mice)



Victory Gin (Nineteen Eighty-Four)

Wine Poisoned with Iocane Powder (The Princess Bride)

Water Reclaimed from Human Bodies (Dune)

Parsley Soda (A Series of Unfortunate Events)

Plastic Cup of ‘Tea’ from the Nutrimatic Machine (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)


Leaving so soon? You’ve lost your appetite? What a pity…

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